This episode is juicy! You'll walk away with your own personal five step to-do list for manifesting the love you deserve right now. As a psychic medium, "love -life" is an area I've worked on with 100s of clients and I'm sharing my best tips (& biggest mistake I see) with YOU in this solo episode, just you and me!  

Intro to the episode. 0:01 

Step 1: Cleaning House, Literally: How to make space for someone else. 1:55 

Step 2: Clean House, Emotionally & Spiritually: How to do your work 5:10 

Step 3: Law of Attraction: Appreciate the abundance of love. 8:32 

Step 4: Put it out there! Both literally and energetically. 11:18 

My wish for you and why you shouldn't wait the experience Love 18:10 

Step 5: Be the Love (and the biggest mistake I see). 21:20 

Ways we can connect! 23:00

Hey beautiful soul and welcome to another episode of spirit speakeasy. If you are joining me for the first time, I'm so happy to have you if you are a returning friend, welcome to your seat at the table. I'm really excited about my topic today this episode is going live the week of Valentine's Day. So it is perfect timing. For this topic, the topic is manifesting love now, five action steps to attract the love you deserve is the biggest mistake I see with clients. This episode is going to be juicy, it is going to give you specific details, almost your own personal five step to do list for manifesting the love you deserve right now. I'm so excited to share this with you. So let's get into it. I have to tell you that one of the things that people come in for a reading for if it is not to connect with a loved one that has passed away crossed over to the spirit world is to learn about their relationship. Perhaps they're having a challenge relationship, perhaps they are wondering, Where is my love? Meeting? Like, where's this partner? How do I attract my ideal partner? Love is one of the main reasons people get a psychic reading come in for a psychic reading. So I'm going to talk to you about these five action steps for how you can manifest the love you deserve now, and I'm also going to tell you the biggest mistake that I see clients making. I'm really excited to share this. So I'm going to dive right in the first action step of these five to attract the love you deserve is clean house, literally. So what do I mean by this? I mean, maybe you're saying Joy already cleaned my house? What are you talking about? It's a different type of house cleaning. So yes, you could do an energetic space clearing, if that's your thing, and you're into it. You could do sage or just really clear the energy of the house. But I mean, literally clean the house. Make space for someone else make space for this love in your life. If you were to go into your bathroom right now, let's take a little mind journey. If you were to go into your bathroom right now, and look at the medicine cabinet. Do you have open shelving? Do you have any room in there that someone else could come in and put items in? Not that we're gonna jump into a move in relationship, but it's the energy setting it up for? This is the place I'm I'm leaving open for my love to come in. When you think about your bed, get a mental image of your bed right now. And you think about your side tables on your bed. Do you have a bunch of junk all over? The other side table? If you've got to do you even have to do have a place? Or if there's one, you know, have your bed situated so that there's only room for one? Do you have all the space taken up? Do you have any room at all for someone else? Do you have your house so cluttered with your things that there couldn't possibly be room for someone else to be there. And let's face it, just clearing clutter in a physical way, tidying your space making organization, it shifts the energy to allow for a flow. It's a Fung Shui thing if you're into that, which I definitely am. It's moving that energy moving items clearing out so there's just a cleaner feel. But like I said, Where's the space for your love to come in? If they wanted to add some books to your bookshelf right now? Could they do that? Do you have space for them. So really, you know, this tip is a literal action stuff that anyone could do right now to just start making space. Sometimes I tell people clear a dresser drawer, clear drawer in your dresser. And definitely if you have clothing that belongs to an ex like you're just keeping a couple outfits over there that they used to leave over there. It's time to release those and let them go. There's other people that can use those clothes and unless it's like your favorite hoodie, keep it but if it's you know, just items of your exes, I had a client tell me they still have their exes underwear in their drawer. And immediately I was like well, well how are you open to a relationship in your energy if you've got these personal items of someone else. So I actually believe it's totally fine to keep gifts that an ex gave you you know if you've got jewelry or if you've got sentimental items that you've just really like as an item then keep it but if it's holding you in some way, longing for them in your mind, release it if it's their T shirts and underwear and clothing items, release them like I said unless it's your absolute favorite. Putting your over shirt. You can definitely keep that But besides that, think about releasing those types of items. So our second action item on your five step to do list for manifesting your love now, number two is do your work. So this is more of a cleaning house but energetically, spiritually, personally do some personal development, some emotional developments and spiritual development. get very clear on what you want in a partner. And I'm not talking about physical qualities here I'm talking about core qualities, write them down. Do you want someone to have integrity? Do you want someone who's considerate? Do you have other qualities, qualities, not physical attributes, but qualities that you're looking for in a person. Sometimes people call these non negotiables. But also, while you're doing that, and getting clear on who it is that you want, be diving into those difficult emotions within yourself, free up some energetic space, and you clear out those emotions, perhaps you want to dive into a topic like attachment styles and learn how you attach to people or the type of people that you're attracted to. And whether that's based on what's good for you, or whether that's based on an old pattern, maybe you want to understand your Enneagram number, which is kind of a personality typing system. Maybe you just want to read a self help book about how to be the most grounded and present version of yourself. There are lots of different ways to do this personal development, spiritual development, maybe you're starting a meditation practice, but it's really just doing some cleaning house internally. And that will also help you to get much more clear on what qualities are truly the most important to you. And then as a little sub topic to this one, don't settle for less than these qualities that you have deemed the most important to you and a person. For example, Don't make excuses for someone, if you start seeing someone new, for example, and one of your things that's really, really important to you is just someone who values time and and values you and your time and respects you. And they cancel plans last minute, several times, they show up late. You gotta let them go. That's a red flag for you them. So don't settle for less than these qualities. If you say that you want someone who's a person of integrity, and then you have someone that starts talking to you and you find out that they're still partially in their previous relationship. Well, that's out of integrity. Why would they be talking to someone new when they're still involved with the previous person that's messy, that's out of integrity. Don't settle, don't settle. The way I say it to my clients is I want you to be ruthless and cutthroat. When you see a red flag, just cut that person off. So that's just the second action step for you. And I know that's a few rolled into one a bit of personal emotional spiritual development, a bit of getting clear on what's actually the most important to you. And then a bit of once you start engaging with people that you might be interested in really just cutting them off. If you notice that they are out of alignment with your most important qualities, your list number three of these five action steps to attract the love you deserve. It's about love. It's about law of attraction. Step three, I just wanting you to really recognize that love comes in many forms. And law of attraction says that we need to appreciate the abundance we have to attract more Now follow me on this one. Law of Attraction basically says like attracts like. So how does that apply here? To finding love? Well, I want you to start thinking about the abundance of love that you already have in your life. Yes, perhaps it's not the romantic partner you desire. But there are other forms of love. Like I said, it comes in many forms. Where can you celebrate the love that exists in your life? Do you have friends? Maybe you have one friend? Do you have family? Do you have pets? Do you have hobbies that you love and people that you engage with through these hobbies? You know, maybe someone's just your running friend or they're your pottery friend or their your fishing friend?
Where can you start to more regularly more intentionally, more consciously and constantly recognize the love that is coming to you all the time? The people that show up in your life, the people that really care about you, good days and bad and that are there for you. And like I said, maybe it's your pets and start appreciating and celebrating you that love. Maybe it's just dropping some texts from friends and saying, Hey, I really appreciate all the support you give me. I know I don't tell you a lot, but I love you. And I appreciate your love. Maybe it's a different kind of friendship and you just want to reach out and say, hey, just thinking about Jen, I want you to know that I appreciate you could be as simple as that. But it's starting to appreciate the abundance of love that you have right now. Because like attracts like. So when you're in appreciation of abundance of love, in a nutshell, the universe is gonna say, Oh, they like to be an appreciation of abundance of love, send them more love. But when you're in this attitude of, Oh, I know, I have no one. And, you know, when am I going to find my partner, that's what's missing. For me, you're in this energy, this attitude of focusing on what's missing. So, essentially, in a nutshell, the universe is gonna say, Oh, they like to see a notice what's missing. So let's keep this missing because they obviously want to just say like that it's missing. So just shift that slightly, and start to appreciate the abundance of love that you have right now. Celebrate it, so that you can attract more based on law of attraction. Number four, in our list of five action steps, I really want you guys to be able to manifest this love right now. So number four is a little bit of a different action step, put it out there is action step number four. And I mean this both literally and energetically. Literally, you are putting yourself out there. So you know for some of you, it might look like dating apps. If you are okay with dating apps, I personally I do get asked this a lot. Dating apps are fine. I know lots of people who have successfully met the person for them on dating apps. And let me tell you, this is people of all ages, I know people in their early 20s. And I know people in their 50s 60s. And on that have met someone on a dating app, there are all sorts and all types for every one and every interest. So no shade on the dating apps. But how are you putting yourself out there? Are you putting yourself in places where your person might be? What do I mean by that? What grocery store? Would this ideal person shop at this person that has these qualities, this person? That is your next soul partner? What grocery store? Would they shop at? Do you shop there? Take yourself over there? Do you go to charity events, sporting events, birthday parties that you get invited to? Even though you might feel like oh, I know my friend group? And you know, I'm not interested in anyone there? What if one of them has a new boyfriend and that boyfriend has a brother or a sister, or other people in their lives that you don't know? Are you letting friends and people you know, know that you're open to being set up? Now, I don't mean your overbearing auntie who is always trying to set you up with every person that they know from church or wherever they like to go. I don't mean that. I mean, even your married friends have siblings, their partners have siblings work colleagues in laws. They know people from college. People know people. And we often forget that. Because I have sometimes had clients that when I tell them this, they'll say, but I already know my friend group. And I already know who they got. People meet new people all the time, things shift for people in their work, things shift in other groups that they might belong to, you know, maybe they joined a new gym, maybe they joined a new team, maybe they took on a new hobby that you don't know about the someone new start at their firm. So just allowing people basically permission to know, hey, if you meet anyone that's like this for your little list of your ideal core qualities. And just let them know if you know anyone that sounds like this, that's a great person. I'd like I'm open to being set up. I'm open to it. Because a lot of people too don't want to be that friend that's trying to set you up in case it doesn't work out. They don't want any responsibility, but just letting them know that you're open to it. And again, going to places that you're invited and going places where your ideal person might be. And when I say ideal person, I just want to be very clear that there are no perfect people. I just mean a person that embodies He's the core qualities that align with you and your wants, and your desire for the love that you deserve now. So putting yourself out there, literally, and energetically is our number four action step number five, you might find interesting, it also leads us into the biggest mistake I see with clients. So number five, action step for manifesting love now is be the love. This is similar to that quote from Mahatma Gandhi Be the change you want to see in the world. Be the love you want to receive in your life. How are you showing up lovingly to other people? Are you reaching out and planning dates with friends and planning to go to your friend's kids birthday parties, if they invite you? Are you loving yourself and creating a life that you love? Right now? This is where I'm going to also talk about the biggest mistake that I see with clients. And with people coming in for advice, guidance, coaching readings on their love life. You know, sometimes people have a tendency to think, Oh, I'm going to do this when I'm going to go to that restaurant, when I have a partner that I can go enjoy it with? Why Why wait, be the most vibrant, full hearted version of yourself right now. Right now. It's so attractive when someone is enjoying life, right? I mean, as a friend as a romantic interest just as human to human when you see someone out there enjoying life? Isn't that attractive? Don't you think? Wow, look at that person. I want to be around them or I'm interested to know, you know about their happiness. It is so attractive to see someone living life stop waiting for someone to swoop in and build this amazing life for you. That is really the biggest mistake that I see clients making over and over throughout the years is this wading this thinking up? But I'm so cozy at home and my cave with my blankie. And I don't want to put myself out there. I don't I'm sick of going to parties and I I don't know how to find charity events? And I don't know, well, what would you like to do? What is this vibrant, wonderful life that you're hoping to create with a partner? Is it travel, I'm sure you could find a friend that would travel with you, or a tour group. Maybe you can go on some adventure solo. Is there a restaurant that you're just wanting to try? Perhaps there's a colleague that could go with you could just get takeout. If you don't feel comfortable sitting in a restaurant alone, and you don't have a friend to go with you. But still try it. sit at the bar. You can order food at the bar, you don't have to drink if that's not your thing. Start enjoying your life. Don't wait. If mediumship has taught me anything. And believe me, it has taught me so many things. It's that our days are not guaranteed. I meet people in the spirit world through my clients, sessions that have lived over 100 years. But I've also met people in the spirit world who only got to live a shorter life much shorter sometimes 20s 30s 40s. Passing is often unexpected and totally unpredictable. So why wait? Why put off giving yourself this joyous, build, love build life right now. And the other thing to consider is I want you to have your life feeling so rich, so full, so happy. And when I say full, I don't mean just crazy busy all the time. I mean, fulfilled, full, full of love, full of wonderful experiences of curiosity, full of laughter That's what I mean when I say that. I just want you to focus on how you might not be so the word is thirsty. You might not be so seeking and desperate and honestly thirsty for a partner if you are enjoying your life to the fullest. And then believe it or not, that is almost always when that person appears. When your life is so amazing. That if a great person comes along. Hey, awesome. But if they don't, I'm living my best life right now. And there's no sense in waiting around because the more you wait, it's almost, you know, when people talk about having a block in love, this is usually what it is. It's one of these five things or this biggest mistake. It's, you know, why are you resisting? Why are you resisting the vibrancy of life that you could have? Why are you resisting, calling a friend and having some laughs It doesn't need to cost a lot of money. You could go for walks, you could go to free events. There's lots of ways to build this wonderful life and create the amazing life that you want, right now without a partner, just on your own. And then hopefully, it'll be so much easier for you to let go. Anyone that is showing red flags, because you'll think, man, my piece is so valuable. My life is wonderful right now is this person can add to it in some way. No, they're going to be a drain. Oh, they lie a lot. Well, I can XML because my life so great. I'm not going to just settle for this person just to be with someone I've got so much love already. That's where I want you coming from. So tip number five of these five action steps to attract the love you deserve is be the love. Be the love. Start loving yourself. And not in a light and fluffy meaningless way deeply. Start truly appreciating the beautiful soul that you are. Start making a list, even if it's a mentalist, while you're going for a walk of all the things you love about you. All the things you bring to a relationship, all the ways you give love and show love in your life right now. This is the best way to manifest love. Now. Let me know which of these action steps you're going to try. If you try them, let me know how they go. I would love it. If you did all of them. That would be the smoothest way to attract that love. You deserve a right now. But please know that there is so much love for you here. There's so much love for you. In this spirit speakeasy community, there's love for you for me, I truly hope you start to notice the love around you right now. Because I guarantee you it's there. And don't forget, you also are always surrounded by everyone in the spirit world. People that you did know, people that you didn't know, people that have an interest in what you do. You are supported and fully loved right now, just as you are. I would love to hear any feedback from you either on my social media platforms, you can find me at joyful medium. Or you can even comment on this podcast and I will see it there. But let me know again about the steps how you liked and what you did, and how you're gonna start creating a life that you love right now. And loving yourself more. If you celebrate Valentine's day this week, when this is releasing Happy Valentine's Day, I'll be your Valentine if you don't have one. So big love from my heart to yours. And I just want to thank you for being here with me inside the spirit speakeasy. If you are not already in my Facebook community, I am there a lot I interact a lot. I do some live sessions that I don't do anywhere else. I also offer some free workshops there and I have one that's going to be coming up within the next several weeks that I'm going to be starting to talk about. So if you're not already a member of my Joy's soul, spa, Facebook community, all you got to do is go to Facebook and search groups. It's called Joy's sole spa. And it's totally free to join you do have to answer the questions for admittance because they want to make sure everybody you know is going to play nice basically and is there for the right reasons. So I would love to have you there and you can also engage with me there and let me know how you're doing with these five action steps how you're attracting the love you deserve and really starting to love yourself more deeply and completely, which really changes. Thanks for being here with me inside the spirit speakeasy. Big hugs. And bye for now.